Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden.
But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?”
He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.”
And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?”
cliffhanger … suspense … come back for the next episode …
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ADVERT BREAK
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part two is about to begin please take your seats
The man said, “Dear God, yes you did. You commanded us both not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die. And this little snake thought we were easy marks and he was right as well. We were easy marks. We did wrong.”
Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is your part in this?”
The woman said, “You commanded us both not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die – and we didn’t. The serpent deceived me, and I ate and then invited Adam to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die. And he did. I could have said no to the snake – except I was created innocent and devoid of all shrewdness because I hadn’t eaten of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die. And now I have. So I have just become aware of what “shrewd” means. Just as I now know what “innocent as a dove “ means as well.”
Then the Lord God said to the man, “But you did wrong!”
The man said, “Yes we did. We did wrong – we were commanded by You not to do something and we did that thing. But I have a question, Lord God.”
And the Lord God said, “Go on.”
And the man said, “What is unconditional love, Lord God? I have this sudden awakening that it is relevant here somehow – but as yet my thoughts are unformed and I cannot get the words out.”
And the Lord God sighed, “You really have come a long way in a short time haven’t you, young Adam!”
And the man said, “So unconditional love is part of this moment, Lord God?”
And the woman said, “Lord God, I get the same sense too. That unconditional love is not separate to “later” – but part of this “moment”. That the serpent and the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die were all necessary somehow – all to allow unconditional love to be part of this moment – but not right now – which seems at odds with unconditional love as the thought forms in my mind – and the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die is particularly potent, Lord God.”
And the Lord God was lost for words.
And the woman looked at the lord God and asked, “What IS unconditional love, Lord God?”
And the Lord God looked at them both, “It was going to happen sooner or later … I guess sooner is okay …”
And the man and the woman looked at each with uncertainty.
And the Lord God said, “It’s okay – really it’s okay.”
And the man and the woman drew close to each other and said to the Lord God, “If we work really hard and do everything you tell us for generations to come – if we make the best religion and laws ever seen by mankind to follow – if we refine and hone this way of living by the law – will you forgive us – can you forgive us – will be ever be as One again?”
And the Lord God smiled and said, “Let me get you some clothes, and then we can all sit down around my little kitchen table and have a cuppa and cake together. If you want to talk about all that AND unconditional love, I might as well show you a kitchen, and a table, and chairs – not to mention putting coffee and cakes into the mix as well (thousands of years before I saw them as good).”
And the man and the woman were shown around IKEA by the Lord God, and they picked up a French Press and on the way back found the best carrot cake ever baked (which wasn’t hard as it was the very first ever carrot cake ever to be baked). And then they all sat down around the Lord God’s kitchen table and had a very long chat about The Law and unconditional love and things like that.
And no one ever got cross again.
The end
(or is it?)
cliffhanger … suspense … come back for the next episode (you just know there will be a next episode – this franchise is too good to stop now) …
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Acknowledgments:
a) The Lord God
b) Genesis & The Garden of Eden
c) Don Merritt (who might be wishing he hadn’t prompted the idea)
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Church Set Free 
Okay, Paul, you probably should know that my office chair is a “work bench” seat, so it’s really high. It’s very dangerous for me to suddenly burst out laughing so hard I fall out on the floor. Just so you know, this was a very dangerous thing for me to read. Especially the line, “And the Lord God was at a loss for words.” I almost wet my pants laughing, thinking of God standing there with a confused look. It’s absurd!
So, have you ever read Douglas Adam’s “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”? The tone of Adam and Eve remind me of the awakened consciousness of the whale over Magarathea.
Anyway, I found it interesting that you see a connection between the “knowledge of good and evil” and awareness of “unconditional love”, as if that were possible before God responds to the sin. Isn’t that sort of like discovering light while only ever knowing darkness?
And thank you for the IKEA references. I miss that place so much, but it’s about 8 hours away from me now, such a surprising place to find really good food.
By the way, I also found it interesting that “law” was Adam’s idea. I mean, I get that it’s in terms of using it to appease God and all, but still, I thought that was interesting as well.
So, when are you going to write up the script for Broadway? Add a musical score, and you’ve got a hit on your hands…
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Matt – WOW!! Thank you so much 🙂
And for the additions – this one came from a comment under Don’s summing-up of Song of Songs. I had a “beyond the Garden” sense from the last few lines and Don’s commentary. Don suggested it would worth some words – and they turned out a little different in the end!
One of the things that has always puzzled me about the Christian tradition (as I was taught) is this “original sin” carried down through the ages, and the need for Jesus to come along and wash it all away thousands of years later. Never seemed very loving to me.
And if “the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die” awakens immediate shame – why not everything so much more? Because all these two have known is “love” (light), and now know shame (dark). And shame is cocktail consequence of so many ingredients. So why is it that the two of them have no comprehension of forgiveness and of what love really is (or should be) – unconditional?
And why does God not do what Jesus did – but there and then? And why could the “future” not have been so very different right there and then?
As for the law – I have never seen the “unwieldy structure” (created by the Chosen People) as anything other than a response to being told-taught-accepted that they had messed up big time and owed God even bigger time.
For me The Creation and Garden and original sin has become simply a control mechanism for a people not used to being “a people” – and “the people” fell in love with the control mechanism rather then the reason for it. And for that I think they carry no blame. There is nothing to forgive.
(i see a lot of that around today in those brought up with one way of thinking who fear thinking anything different because they would have to “rewrite” everything – their reason to be, who they are, what they do, how they do it, who they interact with others, how others interact with them … And thinking of those I have seen with that mindset – this is not only “religion” – not only “good or evil” – not “brainwashing” of any overt kind – this is just living and how we live with each other and simply being “human” … But that kind of change is really scary- so scary it is easier to not change than to change!)
And WOW from me to you – Thank you! I never all that was under the surface!! 🙂
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Hi Paul, it seems you approach Scripture as if it is some sort of human document, human origin, human design, and so on. That’s probably where I was confused by some of your dialogue. I view Scripture as a divinely inspired and protected document. That changes how I view things, like the law, the Garden, the two trees, and so on.
Still, very entertaining. And still worthy of a musical score.
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Reblogged this on Just me being curious and commented:
Couldn’t resist the reblog –
Hope you don’t mind.
🙂
Paul
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And in the end, yes they did die just like God said.
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Tom, many times I have wondered about that. About what “not dying” would be like. And I do not think “living for ever” is a blessing. Not on this earth of finite resources. Not with a growing population that never ever reduced – and so would not having children be the law … not just a few – but no children?
And imagine a world without children … without any new creation … without any new energy … with a sameness that never changed.
It is why I love holidays, questions without answers, grandchildren, people from cultures-backgrounds- upbringings unlike my own, all of those “new energy” inputs. With a physical body – eternity doesn’t appeal to me very much.
🙂
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You are right. Living here forever would really suck even if we remained in good health or young. Living with Jesus is going to be a whole another experience and it will involve the spirit.
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